The inquest into the death of Diana, Princess of Wales, has concluded that she was not, in fact, assassinated by an MI6 "wet works" hit squad on the orders of His Royal Highness The Prince Philip, Duke of Edinburgh, a.k.a. "Phil the Greek".
Everybody who really needed ten years of delays, a six month-long inquest, and about $15M to discover that, please raise your hand. Anybody?
Of course, some people will point out that what the coroner actually said is not that it didn't happen, but that "there is not a shred of evidence" to support the theory -- which just goes to prove what a good clean-up job MI6 did, right?
The only remaining question then is why, of all the possible headlines the BBC could have chosen for this story, they chose to go with this one...